Willkommen, bienvenue, welcome!

I can't be arsed to change out of me pj's.

Make yourself at home. Make yourself a cuppa. Better still, make me one.

No fucking drama.

My rules.

Life is a cabaret old chum, but there'll be no drama on my fucking watch

Share the duvet and get the wine open luv. Hold the drama though, I've got my comfy pants on, drama can cock off!

Red or white.

The dilemma!

In order to avoid the drama, lets have both.

I like your thinking.

Let's open the vodka too. Just in case, you understand.

And the Rum. That should cover all eventualities.

Rum? We'll be overrun with pirates..if we're lucky...

I'll get extra rum! A bit of shivering timbers will go down a treat right now!

Cor. I haven't had my timbers shivered since monday morning.

Now I've got the fackin' 'orn.

I've had an obscene amount of shivered timbers this week. OBSCENE! Seems to be an unscratchable itch atm, the more I get the more I want. I fucking live being in my thirties!

It just gets betterer and betterer!

How rude!

At least Rudeypants is wearing them - for a change...

Im surprised she can remember how to put them on!

Why do Essex girls wear knickers?

To keep their ankles warm!


*runs*
*very fast*